Practical H.E.D.G.E.S. For Purity: Guard Your Ears

“Hello dearie!”

Hello!

“Just want to know how you’re doing and say goodnight before you fall asleep”.

With smiles in her eyes… I thought we just said goodnight about 15 minutes ago.

“Really! Guess I want to hear your voice again and pray with you before sleep sweeps you away”.

Ok ooo

“So you’re in bed now, right?”

Yes!

“Ok, let’s pray.” Dear Lord… Amen!

Thank you so much Bro Kenneth.

“It’s a pleasure dear. And please call me Kenny.”

*Chuckles* Alright, thanks Kenny!

“Beautiful!”

“I want you to have a good rest, so I’ll say goodbye now.” “Good night dear!”

Good night!

She dropped her phone on her bed, shoving her pillow from side to side so as to ease the swelling feeling and smiles dancing around her ears.

And just like a well timed Bollywood movie, the music from her radio filtered into her ears – “If I could run away…” Her mind’s ear could hear Kenny say those words to her.

The sweeping sound of the night breeze seemed like a whirlwind that would fly them into the full moon that smiled at her through her window.

Her heart indeed did – run away…

***

This girl’s story is no different from that of a lot others.

And oh girl, how our ears love to be tickled! But just like we discussed earlier, the fruits we bear are products of seeds that gained entrance through our gate – the EAR being one – and gets sown in our hearts.

You remember the first compromise by the first woman; it was a product of what got into her ears. “Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?  And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die”. (Genesis 3: 1,4)

She heard what the devil told her, and instead of shunning him and walking away, she engaged him in a dialogue, and heard more from him until she fell for his suggestions.

Is that not the case of many a girls today? Their purity got infected with – emotional, mental and physical – bacteria because they opened their ears to flies and her counterparts.

So girl, to guard your ears from those infections, you have to intentionally beware of these…

Ready?

Take note!

The Sugar-Coated  Words

Sweet, endearing and affirmative words caress the heart, but contaminate it if not filtered.

But we’re “just friends” or just brethren”. Yes! We may not have bothered wearing the ear filters if our hearts were without emotions, and emotions without attraction magnets.

And how about those words that suggest romantic feelings and acts; they’re seeds that will choke up purity and bear immoral fruits.

So girl, we’ve got to learn how to deal with them. Here are some tips –

• The every call – I miss you, you mean a lot to me, I can’t stop thinking about you, and I love you in Christ – talks from that “friend” abi brother… It gradually erodes your emotional purity, then mental purity, and before long, the physical will thirst to follow.

“What do I do?” Cut off the unnecessary calls. He wants to know why. You don’t find the calls appropriate. Yes I know – that could be hard, because you seem attached to each other. But see what God says – “And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell” (Matthew 5:29).

• The supposedly “harmless” hourly calls – just to know how and what you’re doing – that leaves you wondering, wishing and wanting more… “Anything wrong with that?” You could help us with the answer. What rationally reasonable thing could he be telling you for hours every day. And you call it “just friend”, just be sure you won’t start crying latter…
• Why give your phone contact away like a “good morning”. You say you’re a Christian, you cross path him, and even the flirtatious comments he makes spells he’s not even on the same track with you. He demands your phone no so he can pursue and woo you into what he calls a “relationship”… Then you give him your no, and he begins to bore you with incessant calls and texts. Any wisdom there? No! Learn to say, “I’m sorry please, I don’t give my no. away like that”. I can’t count how many times I’ve said this – just to guard my ears from stories that touch. May God’s Spirit direct you! “A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself: but the simple pass on, and are punished” (Proverbs 22:3).
• Rather than feeling flattered by an inappropriate or dirty remark, politely and sternly shun it – “I don’t appreciate such comments”, and you walk away… Don’t stand there blushing and saying “thank you” over – “the sight and thought of you make me sweat in the cold weather” talks. You lick it up; tomorrow you’ll hear him say something dirtier… “Neither give place to the devil” (Ephesians 4:27).

“Just Friends”, but He’s Not Saying Anything

Back to our introductory story!

So after some months or years of intimate “just friendship”, one morning, Kenny calls her…

“Hi dearie! I have something special to tell you today. I’ll call latter in the day.”

Alright! I’ll be waiting to hear.

Anxiety didn’t allow her take breakfast, even lunch. Her phone was glued to her hand.

Is this my much expected day? Guess he’s about to pop that question I’ve been waiting to hear.

Latter in the day seemed like eternity.

Yea! He’s calling. Hi Kenny!

“Hello dear!” I’m sorry for delaying, I’ve been busy. Yes, this is good new!

Sister Sandra said YES to my marriage proposal… I’m so happy!”

Did I just hear…

She didn’t have to look for fainting space. Thank God her bed was right behind her; at least she didn’t break her head.

*Painful*

But this beautiful sister would have saved her heart this injury if she hadn’t given in to those petty talks her ears collected from Bro Kenneth.

So sis, please… Save yourself from such “he’s not saying anything”, only to wake up one day and he’s say something unexpected. Here again are some tips for you –

Be a Girl of Emotional Integrity: We earlier said this means (in your friendships with males) you are – aware of the possibility of getting emotionally attached, alert (able to think clearly and notice things) in your friendships, and honest enough to yourself to say – “I need to apply checks here.

Be Attentive: Watch carefully your interactions with male friends, and discern appropriately. Is the friendship really defined? Are we leading each other on? Ask the right questions when necessary. Not “where is our friendship heading to”? But questions that could help you understand his boundaries – “What do you think is appropriate in a ‘platonic’ Godly friendship between opposite sexes?” If he’s a smart Godly brother who wouldn’t want to toy with your heart, he’ll be awakened to the consciousness of what he says to you and the friendship in general. If he just plays around such questions, and goes on filling your ears with words that are meant for someone special – his wife – avoid him. He could be potential “Bro Kenneth”.

Be Realistic: If he’s a friend, then he’s simply a friend. Don’t seek his exclusive attention. Don’t give him your exclusive attention. Why become jealous when you see him call and talk to another sister.  You mummy and wife him – doing his cooking and washing – so that he’ll finally husband you; why? He’s talking to you over the phone – hourly, daily – what is he saying? He missed your call, you’re sad… You couldn’t take his call at the moment, he’s angry… For what?

“Unless a man is prepared to ask a woman to be his wife, what right has he to claim her exclusive attention? Unless she has been asked to marry him, why would a sensible woman promise any man her exclusive attention? If, when the time has come for a commitment, he is not man enough to ask her to marry him, she should give him no reason to presume that she belongs to him.” (Elisabeth Elliot)

Messy Media Messages

Worldly music, jokes and talks are filled with messages that – pollute the heart, undermine biblical injunctions, and do not exalt God. That’s why the bible says – “Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world. And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever” (1 John 2: 15-17).

Such worldly messages, especially music, are filled with words that fuels and ignites sensual fire. Just be honest, as they flow into your ears, what happens? The mind gradually gets polluted with imaginary scenes, the emotions get aroused…

Is purity not threatened already? It is!

Richard Baxter wrote, “Keep as far as you can from those temptations that feed and strengthen the sins which you would overcome.

If you’re wondering how to pick/choose what to allow into your ears, John Wesley’s mother has a counsel for you.

When he was in college, the great evangelist John Wesley wrote a letter to his mother asking her to give him a clear description of sin. In reply, she wrote –

Take this rule: whatever weakens your reason, impairs the tenderness of your conscience, obscures your sense of God, or takes off the relish of spiritual things; in short, whatever increases the strength and authority of your body over your mind, that thing is sin to you, however innocent it may be in itself.

Let Him Feed Your Ears

There’s someone who can feed your ears with words so lovely much more than anyone else can do…

He’s the Most High God! The God of love!

The God whose word created the Heavens and Earth, raised the dead, healed the sick, calmed the storm, brings comfort and peace to the broken heart, and soothes the soul.

A boy may tell you – “you look beautiful”; but His word says “you are fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139: 14).

You might feel swayed by the “I love you” of that boy; but God says “I have loved thee with an everlasting love” (Jeremiah 31:3).

The “you mean so much to me” of that guy can’t be compared to God’s “he that toucheth you  toucheth the apple of his eye” (Zechariah 2:8)

No matter how much that boy promises to “always be there for you”, it can’t match God’s promises of  – I will never leave thee nor forsake thee (Hebrews 13:5); “Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee” (Isaiah 49:15); “When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee” (Isaiah 43:2); “but they that seek the LORD shall not want any good thing”. (Psalm 34:10).

And even if he claims he can sacrifice anything for you, He can’t do what Christ did for you – giving His own very life to save you from sin (John 3:16).

God’s love is so real! Make Him your friend, Lord and Saviour today. Learn to spend time in His presence – just listening and hearing from Him. And at the very right time, you’ll hear Him tell you about that son of His – your husband – whom He’s sending to love and cherish you. Those endearing words from him will be remarkably real.

Until then, and always, let God feed your ears.

Ohhh dear girl! I’m sure your HEDGES are almost set. We’ve got just one letter to go – S. You know the last things kind of carry weight. And this particular one…

Just come next week and see!

Yea! But before you walk away, I’ll love to hear from you. Drop your comments in the box below. Or, contact me here.

Let’s talk RADIANT PURITY!

Remain Radiant!